So the Posh Spice Victoria Beckham is the guest judge for the first episode of this season’s American Idol.  Frankly, I don’t get it.  She can’t sing.  If the camera adds 10 lbs, she needs more camera’s on her.  Seriously.

Anyway, it SHOULD help with the ratings.  I mean, I have this feeling my blog will get a few hits just because I blogged about Victoria Beckham on American Idol and put it in bold.  That’s how the internet works, is all.  I wish I knew how to monitor the stats on this blog, though.  Would be more enlightening.

I love my new weights set.  Been lifting almost every day since I got them, and I’d be lifting now, too, except we have visitors and I don’t want them seeing me pumping iron.  Since I’ve gotten back into all this lifting, I’ve decided I might as well some bodybuilding supplements to supplement my income.  Get it?  See what I did there?  I crack me up.

Anyway, if anybody here is interested, I’ve got all the supplements you’ll need.  I’m also somewhat of an expert on these things, so I’ll throw in a free consultation and workout program.

You guys want weight loss stories?  I have one for you.  In roughly one month, I’ve lost 5lbs, an inch off my waist, and an inch off my thighs.  In that same month, I also gained one inch on my chest.  All that dieting and working out is really paying off.  I think if I can keep it up for another month, I’ll be looking pretty good.

I might have to start doing some cardiovascular activity to get really ripped, though.  I’ll probably start playing basketball again at least twice a week.  It all adds up.

You know what disturbs me?  Fat women in short shorts or skirts.  There’s just way too much skin that I don’t want to see.  Unfortunately, there seems to be some law that dictates that these horizontally challenged ladies show off their logs, i mean, legs.

I mean seriously.  The least they can do is hit the gym for a few months first, or try out some miracle cellulite cures.  It really disturbs me when I see all that cellulite hanging out.  Let go of the diet coke and get on the treadmill!

I’m sorry, I’m not usually this mean!  Just practicing!

Ever get the feeling that advertisers are getting better and better at selling their products?  Just the other day I saw an ad for wrinkle cream for women and I wanted some!  I swear, these guys are con men with ties!  They could sell ice to eskimos.

My biggest weakness?  Those Nike commercials.  I always get the urge to go out and buy whatever new shoe has Kobe’s name on it.  That’s awesome branding right there.  I could use that kind of branding for myself right here.  Everybody in this world is selling something, man.  It’s themselves, and most of us need better marketing.

I’m pretty good with handling money now, but there was a time when I was just terrible at it.  I’d forget how much money I had to spend and just overspend on things.  I really could’ve used some personal budget software for my finances back then.  It’s a wonder I never went broke.

Then again, I grew out of that phase, and I think I learned a few valuable lessons about balancing my money because of the experience.  I just hope everybody else is as lucky.  Once you start making money, you’ll realize the value of it.

I know I just keep blogging about getting in shape and eating well and keeping my face clean, but that’s because I’ve got plans, man!  I want to get paid for my looks this year, and I’m going all out to make that happen.  If I have to get exposed skin care or buy more whey protein, then that’s what I’m going to do!

Now I have no idea if it’s actually going to happen, but hey, we all have to have goals!  You know, besides, making boatloads of money.

I know it’s cliche, but I’m going to exercise more this 2010.  Everybody always says how they’re going to go to the gym more and everything, and I get it.  January is get-in-shape month for most people, myself included.  So far, I’m doing okay.

I hope everyone’s doing as well as I am.  So if you’re constipated, I have you’re looking into colon cleanse solutions.  If you’re ugly, I hope you’re getting some work done.  Whatever you want to improve on this year, good luck, and more power to you!  Brand new year!  Yeah!